Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
