are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
