I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
