Taylor Swift is so right about you.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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