dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
