its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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