So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
NoShamevember. You game?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Randomize
