whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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