I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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