I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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