And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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