i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
May the power of my ass compel you!!
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
