Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
