After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
