yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
