Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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