never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You took a bar mat shot.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
