im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
