But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Fuck appropriateness.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
