So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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