She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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