You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
