paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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