Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I could make wine with my vomit
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
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