ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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