Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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