worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
