you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
