3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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