i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
