I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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