there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
