k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
