Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
