the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
