Do you still have your period?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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