it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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