He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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