Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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