he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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