People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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