winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize