What did we do last night that was yellow?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
