Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize