I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize