So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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