are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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