I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
