People in love make me want to vomit
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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