It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
