I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
